What a bizarre world I find myself navigating at the moment! Today is the first day this week that I have actually been awake, that I have eaten, and showered, and had any water to drink.
This week I have begun the process of weaning off the anti-depressant medication I have taken for two and a half years, in order to wean on to another type. I’ve hesitated in doing so, fearing this process and the probable side-effects, but my medications haven’t been working very well for the last few months, so I guess I have nothing to lose and, potentially, much to gain.
As a result (at least, I assume it is a result of starting the process and being on half my regular dosage), I have been asleep and completely disengaged from the world for the last few days. I dare say that I will be heading back to my hidey-hole again soon, too! The world is bright, and loud, and jarring!!
It’s not just my medication regimen that is in flux at the moment. My career is also undergoing some changes, the natures of which are still in limbo. So it’s a stressful time at the moment. However, I’m trying not to measure myself by this or the next couple of weeks. I know that this is a transition time while my brain chemistry undergoes some readjusting.
Having said that, though, I am crossing my fingers and toes and hoping that I re-emerge soon, and with renewed vigour and mental clarity. I’d like to get my life back, as I’ve got to start planning for the future, and I need a clear head and a light at the end of the tunnel.
Though I may be a bit on the quiet side for the next couple of weeks while my meds (and thus brain chemicals) fluctuate, rest assured that I’m around, checking in when I can, reading when I’m awake enough to do so, and I will be back on full power soon!
Love, Jupiter x